Lady Who Ended Her Marriage to Pastor Shares What Happened: "I Realised Something Was off"
6 min read
- A pastor's wife has publicly announced the crash of her marriage, shedding light on what really happened
- In a lengthy video, the former pastor's wife disclosed that she got married at 20 and opened up about how she found solace in marriage at the time
- A few months into her marriage, the 28-year-old highlighted certain changes in her husband that signalled to her that things were going wrong
The former wife of a pastor, @adiamond.charise, has gone public with the crash of her marriage.
"Why I am no longer a pastor's wife," she captioned her explanation which was released on TikTok in two parts.
Source: TikTok
What ex-pastor's wife noticed about husband
In the first video she released, the 28-year-old said she got married at 20 and gave a backstory as to why she married that early.
A few months into her marriage, she noticed changes in her husband's behaviour that made her realise that their marriage had gone south.
She noted that her ex-husband was always tired, fatigued, had chronic migraines, and a lot of inflammation in his body. Her lengthy part one narration went thus:
"Okay, here is part one of why I am no longer a pastor's wife. I got married at 20 years old. I know I only look 20, but I'm 28, and I got married at 20. At that time—what I now know, obviously, being very young—is that my life was really broken. I was really broken from seeing my parents go through divorce.
"It was a six-and-a-half-year process. I think my mom told me when I was in the sixth grade that she and my dad were going to be divorcing, and they did not finally divorce until I was in the 10th or 11th grade. So for all those years, I was like, “My parents are going to be together… they’re not. My parents are together… they’re not.”
"Within that span of time, I also witnessed three very close family members pass away—my grandmother, my great-grandmother, and my uncle—all within the span of about two and a half years. I also remember leaving my childhood home and not getting to say goodbye to it. It was a culmination of things.
"My mindset getting married so early was: I want a family. I want to create what I no longer have. And I would say that I had the most amazing mom in the sense that she is such a nurturing soul. She was a stay-at-home mom, and I wanted to be like her.
"I remember after graduating high school—this is only two or three years before meeting my former spouse—I wanted to go to performing arts school. But a lot of things prohibited that from happening. There was a lot of fear, and one of the biggest factors was the relationship I had with my mom at the time. I allowed her influence in my life to deter me from going to the school I really wanted to go to.
"I was also in a very shaky place in my relationship with God. I’ve known God my whole life. People joke and say, “I bet you were so fun before you were a Christian,” but I have never not identified as a Christian. I’ve always known Jesus. I got baptized at like 7 or 8 years old. And I love Him. That’s my dog. I would not be here without Him.
"The decision not to go to performing arts school left me very lost and confused. The one thing I started to realize I loved a lot was ministry. So I had this mindset that if I wasn’t going to go to performing arts school, then I was going to sing for God. I didn’t want to sing for the world; I wanted to sing for God.
"That put me in this space in ministry where I was very fascinated with how the church worked. I always wanted to perform—I went to a performing arts elementary school from kindergarten through fifth grade—so I’ve always naturally desired the platform. Being on a platform makes me feel alive. I feel it’s a skill and a gift God has given me, both in the world and in the church. And I was trying to understand how those two sectors came together.
"My “type” became men who were on the platform in ministry. I gravitated toward that type of man, which wasn’t far-fetched since I grew up in church all my life. During COVID was the longest period I had ever gone without attending church. All this is backstory to help explain why I got married young, what my life looked like beforehand, and the struggles and childhood traumas that led me to the decisions I made.
"Meeting my former spouse happened at a church I had attended for several years in Georgia. When I first saw him—there’s a whole story on YouTube; a lot of y’all know this—I felt something. I even had a video titled “Crazy God Story: How I Met My Husband.” I’ll gladly put it back up. Gladly. He’s not in it.
"I remember being on stage getting ready to do worship. During rehearsal he walked in, and I had this out-of-body experience. I was like, “That’s my spouse.” This man ended up moving to the church. I didn’t know he was going to. I didn’t know who he was at all.
"We became close friends over a year and a half. He was on a two-year no-dating commitment. Once that was over, we talked. He told me he wanted to date me. I told him I felt God gave me a word about him. And we got married.
"The marriage itself was never great. You don’t know what you don’t know because you’ve never been married. But I had this underlying discomfort about the way I wanted to feel. By 2018, social media was evolving, and I felt this discontentment with my life. I would see people interact with each other romantically and think, “That’s not real. Men don’t really feel like that about their women.”
"One of the first moments I realized something was off was four or five months into our marriage. I walked into the living room behind the couch, and he jumped—as if I didn’t live there. I said, “Hey, I live here. You good?” He’d been very quiet. His response was, “Yeah, I’m just watching TV.”
"I will never forget that moment. That was the moment I realized, “This is not the same person.” And that was only four or five months in.
"From there, things went downhill fast. He was always very tired, very fatigued, struggled mentally, had chronic migraines, and a lot of inflammation in his body. I could never put my finger on what was wrong.
"And that’s where part one ends. Part two is coming."
Source: TikTok
Watch her part one video below:
Watch part two below:
Woman's explanation triggers mixed reactions
Legit.ng has compiled some reactions to the woman's explanation below:
Sonja R. Price Herbert said:
"I was a pastors wife for 20 years … married at age 21 😕 and been divorced 14 years .. thanks for your transparency."
Que | TripleShiftMom💗💙💙 said:
"This wasn’t enough for a part 1 cause where is this going?? Fatigue ? Inflammation??"
In a related story, Legit.ng reported that a Ugandan pastor had broken up with his wife and announced his decision on Facebook.
Pastor's wife who divorced husband speaks
Meanwhile, Legit.ng previously reported that a pastor's wife who divorced her husband after five years had opened up about her failed marriage.
In an interview with SVTV Africa's DJ Nyaami, Margaret disclosed that her marriage to the pastor was tiresome, saying it was ''God who saved me.''
Recalling her marriage to the pastor, she established that the ideal period for dating is one year, as she revealed that being the wife of a pastor ''is a lonely walk.''
Source: Legit.ng
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