"I Don't Wash": Nigerian Lady Slams Boyfriend’s Mum as She’s Asked to Cook, Wash Plates During Visit

• A Nigerian lady shared how her boyfriend was treated like royalty in her family home, where her mother cooked for him, her father bought him drinks, and her siblings washed his plates
• Her experience at his family house was very different, as she was asked to cook for everyone and later clean the dishes, leaving her upset with the unfair treatment.
• She later voiced her frustration online, criticising the belief that a woman’s value lies in enduring suffering and making it clear she would not accept such expectation

A Nigerian lady has sent a strong message to her boyfriend and his mother-in-law after an unpleasant experience during a visit to their family home, where she was asked to cook and wash plates.

The young woman narrated the incident, pointing out the difference in treatment compared to when her boyfriend visited her family house.

Lady calls out boyfriend, his mum

According to her, when he came over, her mother personally cooked for him, her father bought him drinks to make him feel welcome, and after he ate, her siblings cleared and washed the plates he used.

However, when she visited his family home, things went differently.

In a post she shared on her TikTok page, @chisombethel2, she explained her ordeal in detail.

The video was captioned:

“I don go my house, when you ready to marry, carry your mama come beg me.”

She stated that after her experience, she decided to return to her family home and insisted that her boyfriend and his mother must come and apologise before any reconciliation could happen.

Sharing her story, she expressed disappointment at how she was treated. She said that during her visit, she was instructed to enter the kitchen to cook for the entire household and, after that, was expected to wash all the plates everyone used.

Not pleased with the situation, she took to social media to rant:

"I want to get something straight. You came to my house, my mummy cooked for you, I even accompanied her in the kitchen, and when you were done eating, my siblings washed your plates. We treated you like the guest you were, like Igwe.

"But when I came to your house, your mama asked me to go into the kitchen and cook what everyone would eat. Later, you looked at me to carry all the plates everybody used and wash them, as per house girl?

"It’s in your house I realized that wickedness is normal to you. Nonchalance too. Because we don’t really send you for here.

"I know Igbo men do this a lot, where being a ‘wife material’ is measured by the amount of suffering and pain a woman can endure. The woman who endures the most is tagged wife material.

"Brotherly, let me use this opportunity to tell you I am not wife material. Even in my house, I don’t wash my own clothes, so I cannot come and do it for you or your mother. Whether outside marriage or inside marriage, you need to rethink this.

"Now I see why many men treat women so poorly. It’s because they were raised to believe all suffering belongs to women, especially by their mothers. At the end of the day, it’s like your mama is the one you’re marrying because we no really send you here."

She made several other revelations in the clip, and as the video circulated online, many concerned individuals flooded the comment section to share their thoughts.

Reactions as lady sends warning to boyfriend

tehillakiddies said:

"I don’t know who changed the settings sef, in the Bible na man dey do house boy before marrying anyone’s daughter na abi."

Nightingale noted:

"I'm your Abia sister and I'm so mad that you even cooked the food."

Tricia noted:

"Most of our mothers are the enablers of abuse towards the girl child……nothing u fit tell me."

Nancy Oparaji stressed:

"When I was 23, a guy that wanted to marry me,his family made me enter kitchen and I later left him but in my 30s when I visited my fiancé's family."

cammy213 shared:

"y elder brother woke us up to cook and clean since he said our cleaning yesterday was not enough he later told us to stop and did it himself when his girlfriend ..who he no marry that time was coming and the girl had audacity to die..some girls are very wicked."

Precious Uchechi wrote:

"But this is not fair to women."

prettybernie stressed:

"Y I can’t marry an Igbo man, but my dad didn’t do this to my mom tho!."

Archie noted:

"What friends are you keeping."

Movement shared:

"You no really send am but na you e dey pain,🤣😂. you go so tee for that your papa house, dey play. make i no see you for Ekepere Wednesday ooo."

slimbullent wrote:

"I can cook the food o but if they younger siblings around, I will not wash the plate the will."

L'AFRIQUE M'A FIERTÉ noted:

"They are not finding a wife but a house maid."

AO SOLE stated:

"The one wey Dey pain me pass na when the mama Dey sweep when visitor Dey house like I’ll raise my legs up for her to finish sweeping."

Omali shared:

"I never did that oooo. My husband is from Enugu, nkanu to be precise. he is the last born , his only sister is over 10 years his senior. she has been married for over 20 years as well, but when I was being introduced to the family, she visited the house . She cooked and served me. even my mother in-law joined her to serve. the eldest son was even around too. for all the times I visited, I was served. till after I was traditionally married. before I picked up broom to sweep and I did it just once, as tradition demands. till date, I don't serve everybody even as the last wife in the family. I don't know how and where you people see men that makes you turn maid on a first visit."

Ozy said:

"As in eh, I no go ever understand. If I visit my man’s family and not welcomed as a guest, that’s all the sign I need."

Bride sweeps as part of marriage rites

Meanwhile, Legit.ng reported that a Nigerian lady showcased a unique cultural practice during her brother’s wedding. She revealed how the new bride was required to sweep the entire family compound as part of their traditional marriage rites in Urhobo culture.

According to her, the act is performed only if the bride is formally escorted, and she explained what could happen if the rite is ignored. The viral TikTok video drew mixed reactions from netizens, with some sharing similar experiences from their tribes while others questioned the relevance of such traditions in modern times.

Proofreading by Funmilayo Aremu, copy editor at Legit.ng.

Source: Legit.ng