130+ funny dark humor jokes and puns that will definitely crack you up

130+ funny dark humor jokes and puns that will definitely crack you up

Some issues are considered taboo in various communities, making it challenging to talk about them openly, especially in public spaces. However, comedians have found a way to talk about these issues using dark humor jokes. Beware that some people may find these jokes insensitive.

dark humor jokes
Dark humor jokes. Photo: pexels.com, @Wendelin Jacober (modified by author)
Source: UGC

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Dark humor jokes make light of subject matters that are generally considered taboo. Before spitting out a dark joke, check your audience because some people may find it offensive. If you are a fan of dark jokes, check out the collection below.

Hilarious dark humor jokes and puns

We live in a challenging world, and jokes offer a way of relaxing and letting go of stress. While dark humor jokes and puns may be offensive, they are a great way of debriefing.

Short dark humor jokes

Humor is subjective. What one person may find hilarious, another may find dull and boring. Even so, here are short black jokes you can tell to people with a dark sense of humor.

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  • Only the holocaust beats finding a worm in your apple.
  • Welcome to plastic surgery. Nice to see so many new faces.
  • What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
  • The cemetery is so overcrowded. People are just dying to get in.
  • My grief counselor died. He was so good; I didn't even care.
  • My therapist said time heals all wounds, so I stabbed her.
  • Jokes about ISIS are all about the execution.
  • My drinking problem is that I cannot afford it.
  • Where did Lucy go during the bombing? Everywhere.
  • Sex is like air. It only matters if you are not getting any.
  • Blow something up when you are in doubt.
  • My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home.
  • I like my women like I like my coffee: weak and burnt.
  • You get yourself a rope when you enter into a relationship.
  • If you think I would joke about Alzheimer's, forget it.
  • What's green and eats meat? Syphilis.
  • What do you call a disease with many followers? Influenza.
  • I would tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.
  • A Jew with a boner runs into a wall. What does he break? His nose.
  • A dark joke is like food; not many people get it.
  • I got a new definition for many White guys seated on a bench, NBA.

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Funny dark humor jokes

what are some dark humor jokes
What are some dark humor jokes? Photo: pexels.com, @Sachin Bharti (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Black comedy should be above censorship because it does not condone bad things. Instead, it makes light of the bad, ridicules the villains, and empowers people to laugh in the face of adversity.

  • Stop poaching elephants. Everyone knows the best way to eat an elephant is grilled.
  • As I do more laundry, nakedness seems more realistic.
  • I have thought about it long enough, and my conclusion is that I have had enough of being an adult.
  • It was a bitter-sweet end for me as I won the bet after my friend drowned in the lake.
  • What do you call a White girl that can run faster than her brothers? The redneck spinster.
  • My wife left a note on the fridge, "This is not working," but the fridge is working fine.
  • Why won't Monica Lewinsky vote for Hilary Clinton? The last Clinton Presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.
  • What do you call a bacterial disease caused by two grizzlies? Twobearculosis.
  • What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you breathe through that tiny thing?
  • What do you do if a gang of clowns ever attacks you? Go for the juggler.
  • In 1980, I fell off my bike, twisted my foot, and hurt my knee. I am telling you this now because no social media existed in the '80s.
  • If someone burns to death, do they get a discount at the crematorium?
  • My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
  • Give a man a match, and he will be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
  • I just got my doctor’s test results, and I’m really upset. Turns out I’m not gonna be a doctor.
  • "I am sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing, except at a funeral.
  • I never needed unstable relationships to teach me about broken relationship vices; my parents were perfect examples.
  • If you want to stop an argument between deaf people, be fast and switch off the lights. Case ended!
  • The easiest way to know you are ugly is when you are handed the camera every time there is a group photo.
  • Having a mind that is considered dirty makes conversations far more interesting.
  • Patient: Oh, doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation. Doctor: Don’t worry. Mine too.

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Best dark humor jokes for you

best dark humor jokes
Best dark humor jokes. Photo: pexels.com, @Pixabay (modified by author)
Source: UGC

If dark humor jokes make you chuckle, take a peek at this collection. Chances are, you will love them just as much we do.

  • I like dark humor. My favorite movie of all time is 'Harold and Maude.'
  • When I die, I want to die like my grandfather, who died peacefully in his sleep, not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
  • Never break someone’s heart; they only have one. Break bones instead because they have 206 of them.
  • Did you know that your beautiful cats have nine lives? It makes them ideal for experimentation.
  • Girlhood is like a bubble; all it takes is one little idiot, and it is gone.
  • When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I do not find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.
  • The guy who stole my diary just died. My thoughts are with his family.
  • They say there is a person capable of murder in every friendship group. I suspected it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.
  • What is the difference between jelly and jam? You cannot jelly a clown into the tiny car.
  • It is better to be loved than feared, but if you cannot be loved, then fear will do.
  • My elderly relatives would tease me at weddings, saying, "You will be next!" They soon stopped once I began doing the same to them at funerals.
  • It is crucial to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words 'antidote' and 'anecdote,' one of my good friends would still be alive.
  • I wish the grass on my back lawn were emo. Then it would cut itself.
  • What is a pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet? None. Historians have suggested most pirates would have been illiterate.
  • I childproofed my house. Somehow they still got in!
  • Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face. For instance, when you push them down the stairs.
  • My grandfather says I am too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
  • My husband is mad that I have no sense of direction. So I packed up my stuff and right.
  • I remember all the people I lost as I grew older. Maybe a career as a tour guide was not the right choice.
  • I will never forget my grandfather's last words to me before he died. "Are you still holding the ladder?"
  • My friend said it would be his own accord if he went off a cliff. It is a good thing he drives a Civic.

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Morbidly dark jokes

dark humor jokes
Dark humor jokes. Photo: pexels.com, @Egor Kamelev (modified by author)
Source: UGC

We have all realized just how tough life can be over the last few years. We can lighten the mood by cracking a few jokes about things that normally shouldn’t be laughed at, e.g., death, disease, and depression.

  • I don’t have a carbon footprint. I just drive everywhere.
  • Orphans play baseball best because they have no idea where home is.
  • My boss farted in front of a Jewish client, "A little gas never killed anybody."
  • The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies. They’re always so twisted.
  • Funny how a man gave up sex, controlled substances, alcohol, and expensive food to be healthy. It only lasted up to the time he killed himself.
  • The day could not have gotten any worse. My ex-girlfriend was run down by a bus, and I lost my job as the bus driver.
  • You will learn that the only difference between a gun and a rope is the duration one takes to make a knot with either.
  • When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark. But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!
  • After asking my psychiatrist for it, I got a second opinion after he said I was crazy. He said I was ugly too.
  • What’s worse than biting into an apple and discovering a worm? Biting into an apple and discovering half a worm.
  • What did the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs say? “T. rex, I’m coming for my hug!”
  • As recent research suggests, humans indeed eat more bananas than monkeys. I agree because I can't remember when I last enjoyed eating a monkey.
  • Why did Mozart hate all of his chickens? When he asked them who the best composer was, they all replied, “Bach, Bach, Bach.”
  • Did you hear about the blind prostitute? Well, you got to hand it to her.
  • It is always a mixed reaction; when I see a bird fly, I get jealous. When I see it fly into a window, I laugh my heart out.
  • I knocked at my granny's house, and she asked who I was. I guess Alzheimer's got the best of her.
  • My wife asked me to pass her lipstick the other day, but I handed her a glue stick. It happens that she has decided not to talk to me even now.
  • So I went to my friend's house, and he asked me to be at home. So, I took matters into my own hands in my usual style and had him thrown out. I do not like visitors, after all.
  • What has four wheels and flies? A shopping cart full of dead babies.
  • A blind woman tells her boyfriend she is seeing someone. It is either terrible or great news.
  • I have many jokes about unemployed people. Sadly, none of them work.

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Dark dad jokes

dark humor jokes about dads leaving
Dark humor jokes about dads leaving. Photo: pexels.com, @Fireworks Uche (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Dad jokes are normally unoriginal or predictable. There are multiple dark humor jokes about dads leaving and many predictable jokes told by our fathers. Below are some of the top dad jokes in 2023.

  • My dad left five years ago to get milk. I haven’t eaten cereal since.
  • What does my dad have in common with Nemo? They both can’t be found.
  • Why did the man miss the funeral? He wasn’t a mourning person.
  • Fathers take an extra pair of socks to golf in case they get a hole-in-one.
  • I'll never forget my dad's last words, "Erase my search history, son".
  • I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just a kid.
  • Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed. It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.”
  • When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.
  • My wife told me she’ll slam my head into the keyboard if I don’t get off the computer. I’m not too worried — I think she’s jokindkdkslalkdlkfjslfjslksdlkfjuahehwhgwdklaljdf.
  • A man walks into a magic forest and tries to cut down a talking tree. “You can’t cut me down,” the tree complains. “I’m a talking tree!” The man responds, “You may be a talking tree, but you will dialogue.”
  • A child determined to burn his home down. His dad watched, tears in his eyes. He put his arm across the mother and stated, “That’s arson.”
  • Imagine when you walked into a bar, and there was a lengthy line of individuals ready to take a swing at you. That’s the punch line.
  • Wife: “I want another baby.” Husband: “That’s a relief. I also really don’t like this one.”
  • I was digging in our garden and found a chest full of gold coins. I wanted to run straight home to tell my wife about it. Then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.
  • The doctor gave me some cream for my skin rash. He said I was a sight for psoriasis.
  • Don’t challenge death to a pillow fight. Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushions.
  • My mom died when we couldn’t remember her blood type. As she died, she kept telling us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without her.
  • When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug. His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.
  • Want to know how you make any salad into a Caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times.
  • My wife has been missing now for two weeks. The police said I should prepare for the worst. So, I told my new girlfriend that she had better move out.
  • The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.

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Dark humor knock knock jokes

dark humor knock knock jokes
Dark humor knock knock jokes. Photo: pexels.com, @George Becker (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Knock-knock joke is a type of audience-participatory joke cycle, typically ending with a pun. While they are normally used in jokes for kids, there are dark options for adults. Check them out below.

  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) You know. (You know who?) Avada kedavra!
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Allah. (Allah who?) ALLAHU AKBAAAR explodes.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Linda. (Linda who?) Linda Hand, will ya? Mine is tired from chopping this Pygmy.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Lettuce. (Lettuce who?) Please let us out of the basement. We haven’t had food for weeks.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Howard. (Howard who?) Howard you like to be buried, six feet under or cremated?
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Alpaca. (Alpaca who?) Alpaca the shovel; we need to bury the evidence.
  • Knock knock. (Who’s there?) Robin. (Robin who?) Robin kids from their parents sure is a funny way of saying, “All lives matter.”
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Dwayne. (Dwayne who?) Dwayne the bathtub, I’m drowning.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) A little boy. (A little boy who?) A little boy who can’t reach the doorbell.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Wanda Smellmop. (Wanda Smellmop who?) No, thanks, I’m not into scat.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) 9/11. (9/11 who?) You said you would never forget.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Howie. (Howie who?) Howie gonna hide this dead body?!
  • Knock, knock. Who’s there? Interrupting dyslexic cow. Interrupting dysle-OMO!
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Gladys. (Gladys who?) Gladys over, I couldn’t stand another minute of that funeral.
  • Knock, knock. (Who’s there?) Little Boy Blew. (Little Boy Blew Who?) Michael Jackson.

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Black jokes for you

funny dark humor jokes
Funny dark humor jokes. Photo: pexels.com, @Francesco Ungaro (modified by author)
Source: UGC

Listening to someone reel off edgy joke after edgy joke is a fantastic way of allowing your stresses to melt away. Check out this collection of black comedy jokes.

  • What’s the difference between a fifteen-year-old and an eighteen-year-old? Jail time.
  • Why is it wrong to drive around in a van offering children candy? Because you’ll have more success if you give out video games.
  • I got written up on 'Take Your Daughter To Work Day.' Apparently, it only applies to daughters who are alive.
  • Why are overweight babysitters a bad idea? The babies always get crushed when they sit on them.
  • How can you tell your acne is really starting to get out of hand? The blind start reading your face.
  • My dishwasher broke down yesterday. I told her there’d be consequences if she didn’t stop picking at me, but she didn’t listen.
  • What do you call a serial killer who disembowels women and then falls, trying to walk through all the blood? Jack The Slipper.
  • When two vegan parents get into an argument, is it still called beef?
  • How do you make a serial killer with a collection of baby skulls happy? Give him a little head.
  • Why is it wrong to bring fruit on a date without the other person’s consent? It contributes to grape culture.
  • My mother always said I could do anything if I set my mind to it. How was I supposed to know she wasn’t talking about matricide?
  • What’s the difference between a fetus and a baby? My mom didn’t try to stab me when I was a baby.
  • Did you hear about the contractor who died while working on a bathroom? He choked on caulk.
  • One man's trash is another man's treasure, a wonderful saying, a horrible way to find out you were adopted.
  • How did the cannibal know the girl he was eating for dinner had COVID-19? She lost her taste.
  • What’s the first step to mending a broken heart? Removing it from your chest.
  • Everyone tells me to love myself, but they scream at me to put my pants back on whenever I try it.
  • What did the mother say to the father when he freaked out over their daughter’s college tuition? “I bet you wish you didn’t beg me to keep it now, don’t you?”
  • You’re not completely useless. You can always serve as a bad example.
  • Why did the husband dump pancake mix all over his wife? So she could go to a shelter for battered women.
  • How do you get rid of an unwanted pregnancy? Put a banana peel at the top of the stairs.

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What are some dark humor jokes?

There are numerous dark jokes you can tell. Check out the collection above for inspiration.

What is dark humor?

Dark comedy is a style of comedy that makes light of subject matters generally considered taboo in society.

Is dark humor good?

Yes, dark humor is good. However, you should be careful with it because some people may find it offensive.

Is black comedy the same as dark humor?

Yes, black comedy and dark humor mean the same thing. It is also known as morbid humor or gallows humor.

If you tend to feel cheesy, these corny and funny dark humor jokes could make everyone laugh while they roll their eyes. However, you should evaluate the people you are telling the puns too. You do not want to crack a dark humor joke to a sensitive audience and cause strife instead.

DISCLAIMER: This article is for general informational purposes only and does not address individual circumstances. It is not a substitute for professional advice or help and should not be relied on to make decisions. Any action you take upon the information presented in this article is strictly at your own risk and responsibility!

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Every person needs to be reminded of their greatness, especially when they are not doing too well. Well-crafted texts and quotes will encourage a person to rise again and do what they should to improve their lives.

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Cyprine Apindi (Lifestyle writer) Cyprine Apindi is a content creator and educator with over six years of experience. She holds a Diploma in Mass Communication and a Bachelor’s degree in Nutrition and Dietetics from Kenyatta University. Cyprine joined Briefly.co.za in mid-2021, covering multiple topics, including finance, entertainment, sports, and lifestyle. In 2023, she finished the AFP course on Digital Investigation Techniques. She received the 2023 Writer of the Year Award. In 2024, she completed the Google News Initiative course. Email: cyprineapindi@gmail.com

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Peris Walubengo (Lifestyle writer) Peris Walubengo is a content creator with 3 years of experience in writing informational and entertainment articles, researching, editing, and proofreading. She has a Bachelor of Commerce & IT from the University of Nairobi (class of 2019). She joined Legit.ng in April 2022. She covers bios, marketing & finance, tech, fashion & beauty, recipes, movies and video game reviews, culture & traveling. In 2023, Peris finished the AFP course on Digital Investigation Techniques. Email: perisrodah254@gmail.com.

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