How to soften natural hair without relaxer: valuable tips (2022)

How to soften natural hair without relaxer: valuable tips (2022)

Handling natural hair can be stressful if you don’t know how to take care of it without damaging it even more. Here, you will find several useful tips on how to soften natural hair and make it healthier without using a relaxer.

Soften natural hair
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But why is your mane so brittle and coarse in the first place?

Several reasons why your natural hair is so brittle and coarse

There are three basic reasons why it is so hard, tangled, and why it looks as it does. Let’s check them out together and figure out some useful tips on how to soften natural African hair.

It is too dry

What does this mean? Naturally, curly hair has a lot of pores. Through these pores, it loses the moisture that’s inside it. The moisture and nutrition all come from the roots, so if your scalp feels dry, your hair is, probably, dry, too.

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It’s possible that you are using the wrong shampoo or that something from the outside helps it give off its inner moisture. For example, you spend a lot of time in the open, under the sun, or in the wind.

What can be done in this case? It’s necessary to moisturize your hair and your scalp. Check out your shampoo and replace it with a proper one if the current one doesn’t moisturize. Besides that, you need to remember that there are no oils or butters, which are able to moisturize without moisture.

They will never work on dry hair if you don’t apply water first. Remember: always apply oils and butters on wet hair. The oil will seal the pores, not letting the moisture out, and your tresses will quickly start to look much healthier and smoother.

how can I make my natural hair soft without relaxer?
Smiling woman in white and red floral shirt. Photo:, @Andrea Piacquadio
Source: UGC

You don’t use enough conditioner

There’s no other way you can soften your tresses without a conditioner. You need to remember that the more often you use shampoo on your hair, the more prone to dryness it will be, especially at the ends where it’s very hard to comb it properly. If you don’t like, so to say, chemical ones, you can always search for organic options.

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But how do you condition it correctly? Don’t go hard-handed, apply enough conditioner and you will see how much softer your tresses will be. First of all, it will help you detangle the knots that often appear at the ends of hard curly hair. Then, you will notice how much shinier your tresses will be after applying enough conditioner. Finally, you will feel the difference with your own hands when you start to comb and do your hair after the conditioner. It will be less frizzy and much more flexible.

Sometimes it makes sense to wash the conditioner away after the application but it’s better to apply a leave-in conditioner. It will help protect it from the environmental impact until the next wash day. If you prefer a conditioner that can be washed out, try warming the conditioner slightly before usage and leaving it on for about 30 minutes.

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You consume too much protein

Too much protein may make your mane coarse and brittle.

Several tips on how to soften natural hair without chemicals

Many people ask themselves, "How can I make my natural hair soft without a relaxer?" or "What can I use to soften my natural African hair? ". If you don’t mind spending some time in the kitchen, preparing a natural treatment for natural hair, then these tips will help you.

Without further ado, here is how to treat natural hair to make it soft.

Caramel treatment for natural hair

This treatment is thought to be one of the most effective for African hair as it slightly undoes the knots. This is a simple recipe that you can easily reproduce in your own kitchen, and you don’t need any super expensive magical ingredients.


You will need the following:

  • Honey – ¼ cup
  • Ripe bananas (it’s possible to use baby banana food because it washes away easier than bananas)
  • Apple cider vinegar – 1 teaspoon
  • Molasses (Blackstrap) – ¼ cup
  • Olive oil – ¼ cup

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  • Put all the ingredients in a blender and blend until the mixture is smooth and even.
  • Apply the mixture to your hair just as you would apply a conditioner or so.
  • Wear a shower cap or wrap your hair with a piece of polyethylene.
  • Leave the cap on for about 30 minutes or overnight.
  • Rinse the mixture out thoroughly. In case you have leftover of the mask, you can store it in the fridge.
What can I use to soften my natural African hair?
Young girl sitting on pavement. Photo:, @ Misha Voguel
Source: UGC

Coconut milk treatment

This is another effective way to soften natural hair at home with the help of quite simple ingredients.


  • Coconut milk – 1 can
  • Honey – 2 tablespoons
  • Coconut oil – 2 tablespoons
  • Yogurt (plain) – 4 tablespoons
  • Lime – 1 (you will need juice)
  • Cornstarch


  • Mix everything except the cornstarch in a bowl.
  • Then, add the cornstarch by ½ teaspoon at a time until you see the mask is thick enough to be applied.
  • Apply it to the freshly washed hair. Leave it for about thirty minutes and then wash away thoroughly.

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As you can see, there’s nothing too complicated when learning how to soften natural hair. You can easily do all this at home and see your mane becoming much softer, shinier, and healthier.

DISCLAIMER: This article is intended for general informational purposes only and does not address individual circumstances. It is not a substitute for professional advice or help and should not be relied on to make decisions of any kind. Any action you take upon the information presented in this article is strictly at your own risk and responsibility!

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