Sometimes all you need is a simple punchline to lighten the mood, more so in tensed situations. Nothing does this best than one liner jokes that are creative and well-thought-out. Knowing which jokes to crack and when to unleash them is a skill that everyone needs to learn.
Do you know of any one liner jokes you need to try? The secret is to find a joke that works. It is never a great move to crack a joke and no one laughs. You may want to consider the following jokes that you can never go wrong with, regardless of the context.
Top one liner jokes
Some of the best one liners are the easiest and unexpected jokes. You do not have to think too hard to come up with the best one liner jokes. Here are a few examples to model your jokes on. Remember that sometimes the joke will only make sense if you say it out loud.
- What condition does a noodle have when it isn't feeling like it's good enough? Impasta
- What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam
- Why was the pediatrician always losing his temper? Because he had little patients!
- What’s the leading cause of dry skin? Towels
- What’s the scariest plant in the jungle? Bam-boo
- What do you call a row of bunnies moving backwards? A receding hare line!
- How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles
- Why can you never hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the pee is silent.
- Wanna hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it.
- A magic tractor was driving down the road when it turned into a field!
Funny one liners
Some of the best one liners do not necessarily make a lot of sense. These jokes are funny by virtue of not being very logical that it is funny. In fact, they almost never make any sense at all. Check out the examples of such jokes one liners below. You may want to take note of the fact that such jokes will crack you up depending on how they are said. The tone matters.
- What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
- Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?” Because every play has a cast.
- Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them.
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- A woman in labour suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!” “Don’t worry,” said the doctor. “Those are just contractions.”
- Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards? He was just going through a stage.
- Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
- Where are average things manufactured? The satisfactory.
- He just needed a little space.
- How do you drown a hipster? Throw him in the mainstream.
Dry one line jokes that make a lot of sense
Sometimes the best jokes are those that come out dry and blunt. However, one has to be smart to get the joke since it is easy to miss it altogether. Check these out.
- How does Moses make tea? He brews.
- What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
- Why should the number 288 never be mentioned? It’s two gross.
- How do you keep a bagel from getting away? Put lox on it.
- What do you call an apology written in dots and dashes? Re-Morse code.
- Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? Because he lost his filling.
- What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller? “Curses! Foil again!”
- I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday. I can’t wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
- What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.
- How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
- Why did the yogurt go to the art exhibition? Because it was cultured.
- Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank the coffee before it was cool.
- Where does Batman go to the bathroom? The batroom.
- Why did the M&M go to school? It wanted to be a Smartie.
- Rest in peace to boiling water. You will be mist.
Clever one liners
Are you planning to sound very intelligent and witty even when you know you are not? Well, the truth is that you should consider using these cleaver short jokes. You will end up leaving your audience wowed and many of them will have high regard for you.
- What is an astronaut’s favourite part on a computer? The space bar.
- What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches? A nervous wreck.
- Why can’t you explain puns to kleptomaniacs? They always take things literally
- What does Charles Dickens keep in his spice rack? The best of thymes, the worst of thymes.
- A man tells his doctor, “Doc, help me. I’m addicted to Twitter!” The doctor replies, “Sorry, I don’t follow you…”
- Why don’t Calculus majors throw house parties? Because you should never drink and derive.
- What did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matey.
- What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny.
- Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players? They dribble all the time.
- What did the bald man exclaim when he received a comb for a present? Thanks— I’ll never part with it!
- What’s the different between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
- What do you call a pony with a cough? A little horse.
- who stole a calendar? They each got six months.
- What do you call a magic dog? A labracadabrador.
- What’s orange and sounds like a carrot? A parrot.
- How many times can you subtract 10 from 100? Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.
- Why did the frog take the bus to work today? His car got toad away.
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked at me surprised.
- What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk
- What breed of dog can jump higher than buildings? Any dog, because buildings can’t jump.
Clearly, no one needs to work very hard to make other people laugh. All you need is a few right one liner jokes and you are good to go. Make sure you know how to deliver them if you want your audience to laugh.