“It’s Fact”: Therapist Says Illiterate Couples Last Longer Than Educated, Backs It With 3 Points
- A Nigerian relationship therapist sparked heated debate after declaring that illiterate people enjoy stronger, longer-lasting relationships than educated couples
- According to her, less educated partners have fewer expectations, less peer pressure, and less exposure
- She argued that unrealistic demands in educated relationships often lead to depression, mental health struggles, and breakups
A Nigerian woman, who described herself as a relationship therapist, declared that illiterate people have longer-lasting relationships compared to the educated ones.
She explained her stance with strong reasons, sparking widespread debate online.
Source: TikTok
Therapist maintains illiterate couples last longer
The woman, whose identity has not yet been confirmed, shared her opinion in a video made available online, and the post quickly went viral.
Many social media users who came across the clip made available by @kayhikersclubng agreed with her arguments and added their own thoughts in support.
According to her:
"People who are not educated have less expectations, and because of this, they tend to have a more lasting relationship. They don’t make demands beyond what is within their reach, unlike educated people who often compare their partners to others and place demands that, if not met, can lead to depression or mental health crises.”
Backing her claims, she emphasised that uneducated partners tend to focus only on the basic roles of being a husband or wife, while educated partners burden relationships with unnecessary expectations.
“Speaking from the point of view of a therapist, it’s a fact. It’s not debatable.”
For her first point, she stressed:
“Less educated people have less expectations. What exactly has been discovered recently to be the highest reason why marriages don’t work is expectations.”
Source: TikTok
She then expanded on her argument:
“High level of unrealistic expectations because of that, it is a fact-based theory that the lower the expectations, the more realistic your relationship is as a couple, the more success and healthier relationship you will have.”
As a third point, she explained that people without formal education are less exposed to external pressures:
'When they’re not educated, they don’t expect much, they have less information, they have less knowledge, they have less peer pressure, they have less people pressing their necks.”
To illustrate her point, she compared rural marriages with urban ones:
“It’s like a village marriage. Everybody goes to the farm, comes back home. In our knowledgeable society, when we’re standardized to a certain extent, there’s this belief of expectations both on the male and female aspects. A man is expected to deliver certain things, and if he doesn’t, he gets compared to others, becomes demoralized, and falls into depression or mental health struggles.”
She added that women also face impossible demands:
“On the woman’s side, she should be good in bed, she should be a prostitute and a virgin at the same time. A combined set of expectations—and if she doesn’t deliver, it becomes an issue. He goes out to look for it. When you’re in the village, less expectations, you don’t care.”
Her post, shortly after it surfaced online, triggered a flood of reactions as concerned individuals stormed the comment section to share their thoughts.
Reactions trail therapist's take on educated couples
B noted:
"This is why in some countries and cultures women are restricted from education."
Chief Ayuk wrote:
"The problem is not education , the problem is in the kind of education."
Adepypa stated:
"For me it depends on the kind of exposure.. and logical reasons.'
Charles Wisdom explained:
"The independent women won't like This."
wisdom benjamin shared:
"I would say less exposed people last longer."
Prince K. said:
"What do we mean by 'education' Maybe let's talk about formal education."
king K mentioned:
"Everyday relationship talks, so you guys don't know it was poor economy that affected families and individual relationship.'
SENA-FOD3KA stated:
"Most men have uneducated women as wives and the marriage last like forever. But when the table turns where the woman is rather educated, she will not even consider an uneducated man. Both genders have different attitudes when it comes to achievements and success, that is the point to clear."
Humble Nelson noted:
"Uneducated woman arent trapped!! we have educated women who also accept second wife, even third sef, it boils down to morals and beliefs."
sleepy_taurean shared:
"Exposed ppl should just get with exposed ppl tbh. There shouldn’t be a mismatch."
mosthated1 added:
"The statement is true… why would you want better for yourself if you don’t know what better looks like. For people who aren’t educated they are more likely to accept certain behaviours because they don’t know better. It’s left for the people in that relationship to be willing be learn, if it’s only one party willing to learn and change they are better off leaving that relationship.."
To provide further insight on the debate sparked by the relationship therapist, Legit.ng reached out to A. T. Adenekan, a preacher, author, and marriage trainer, for his perspective.
When asked whether he agreed with the claim that illiterate couples last longer than educated couples, Adenekan explained:
"It depends on many factors and the perspective from which you view the matter. In my experience, the key factor that makes a marriage or relationship last is knowledge, what you know determines what you do. Everything that makes a marriage work or fail can be summed up in knowledge and the lack of it."
He emphasized the distinction between literacy and education:
"Literacy is the ability to read and write, while education is the acquisition of skills that enable a person to solve problems in society. A university graduate who cannot apply their knowledge is literate but not educated, while a roadside mechanic who cannot read or write well but is solving problems and making a living is illiterate but very educated. The issue in many societies, especially in Africa, is mistaking literacy for education, they are not the same."
On the role of expectations and societal pressures, Adenekan noted:
"It depends on the level of knowledge of the people involved. Those who know what they need to know will act accordingly, regardless of societal pressures. Those who are ignorant, however, are easily influenced, often to the detriment of their relationships. Anyone who wants to succeed in marriage must seek the right knowledge."
He shared real-life examples to illustrate his point:
"A woman with a PhD in science once consulted me after her marriage collapsed because she didn’t know how to handle marital matters. Meanwhile, another woman with an OND had managed her marriage very well over the years, only needing guidance to improve further. Both were about the same age, the difference was knowledge and its application."
VIDEO
UNILAG lecturer helps students mend eelationship
Meanwhile, Legit.ng reported a viral incident at the University of Lagos (UNILAG), where a lecturer took on the role of relationship counselor during class.
In the trending video, the lecturer was seen settling a quarrel between a young couple, believed to be his students, to the delight of others who clapped and cheered.
Proofreading by Funmilayo Aremu, copy editor at Legit.ng.
Source: Legit.ng
