Love helps people to enjoy life. Its appearance cannot be explained and predicted, and the disappearance of love can break a heart. You cannot make yourself love, even with the greatest desire, perhaps for all these reasons, it remains an unknown mystery. So what is true love in a relationship? Today we will try to answer this question and help you out if you happen to have confused feelings!
Characteristics of true love in a relationship
The famous American psychologist Robert Sternberg after many years of researches has concluded that three essential components combine into the notion of true love. The three essential elements of true love are:
- Frankness. Other similar feelings are sincerity, trust, understanding, intimacy, the desire to help each other, mutual feelings, and mutual sympathy. It is the ability and willingness to a person has no fear of being rejected, ridiculed, or judged. At the same time, it is not necessary that you approve all the thoughts and actions of your beloved one. You should only understand him or her. Or at least you should try to understand. Besides, this ability to accept develops emotional intimacy – complete frankness between two partners.
- Physical attraction. This component is essential on the stage of searching for love. It is believed that men love with their eyes, and women – with their ears. When you meet a person, your physical analyzers react on him or her. First of all, people pay attention at the appearance: on the color of hair, body or voice, and only then you subconsciously decide if a person is worth conversation and discovering the inner world. Physical attraction is like a fuel for romantic feelings. It is the motivational component of love.
- Loyalty. Other similar feelings are devotion, the obligation to be together, the desire to share the present and the future with your beloved one. It includes a conscious intention and a conscious decision to remain faithful to the chosen person, despite the difficulties in the relationship, despite the existence of other attractive objects of the opposite gender. It is the cognitive component of love.
With the help of these three components, we can give a primitive answer to the question “What is love?” Love is frankness, attraction, and loyalty.
Ten signs of true love
1. No doubts
If Cupid is shooting at the heart, then this shot is accurate and leaves the victim no chance for salvation. We fall in love irreversibly: neither circumstances, nor distances, nor natural disasters can prevent this feeling.
2. You cannot answer the question: "Why do you love him or her?"
You do not love anybody for something specific, but for the fact that he or she just exists. You feel that he or she is your soul mate. Of course, you can say that you love a person for beautiful eyes or a fat wallet. But such reasons for true love are irrelevant.
3. You do not pay attention to others
When a person is emotionally concentrated on the object of his or her passion, he or she feels completely indifferent to others. Even if Johnny Depp or Angelina Jolie tried to seduce you, you would not cheat on your dear and beloved.
4. The feeling of safety
With a loved one, under any circumstances, there is a feeling of reliability. The warmth and spiritual unity allow you to be completely relaxed and calm with him or her.
5. There is a development in your relationship
True love is labor. You have to work hard every day, to shape yourself and to improve your feelings. You must feel that every day you become closer, wiser and stronger. You must feel that you learn to adjust yourself to your beloved behavior and she or he does the same. If there is no development – you will split up soon because of some minor issue!
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6. You want to be better
Inspired by the bright feelings to a person, the desire to become better, more interesting, and more attractive appears. At the same time, true love will not require from you unbearable sacrifices and total changes of your ego. In love, there should not be obligatory for sacrifices. All the changes should be based on pure inspiration.
Collecting offenses is a useless exercise! Lovers are always ready to forgive each other. It is not easy for them: sometimes, it literally takes years. Resentment is also a powerful feeling, and forgiveness is a great trial for the lovers. But fortunately, strong love can conquer all insults and heal any wounds.
8. You are a team
You are links of one chain, two independent, equal and equivalent figures. If you do not count your victories and defeats of your beloved, if you do not compete with each other, this is true love. Remember, that you are in one team, and you both play against the difficulties of this big world.
9. You feel comfortable when you are both silents
Having fun and talking on the phone all night long is an absolute sign of interest to each other. Love stories usually begin with such endless exiting conversations. But sometimes silence means more than words. When the silence between two people does not form an awkward pause, a quiet dialogue of two souls begins.
10. You feel when something is wrong
Two lovers are very close on the emotional level, and they can feel when something is wrong. This feeling also provokes a sense of care, desire to help, and strong empathy. If you love your spouse, you feel what is better for him or her.
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With the help of these ten signs, you see now how to know true love. But go on reading if you want to find out what is love all about in a relationship!
What is true love between a man and a woman
Long-term observations have allowed to find out the formula of true love between a man and a woman. It characterized by a particular set of features.
Scientists and psychologists say that love if it is real, happens only at first sight. To feel the proximity of souls, a person needs only half a minute! It is during these 30 seconds that we are able to assess the external data, the smell the characteristics of temperament and the mindset of the future beloved. Someone can argue with this opinion.
Both men and women first experience attraction. The attraction appears on the hormonal level. Lovers become more emotional, sensitive and want to be close to the object of passion all the time.
Couples who have been living together for many years, do not have a hormonal affection, their relationship is based on specific ethical values, to some extent, this can be called friendship and support.
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When a person who is at the stage of searching for the spouse sees a suitable “object,” adrenaline and testosterone are released in the blood. Under the skin, testosterone turns into androsterone, then it comes out with sweat, and later it is absorbed by the bacteria that live on the skin surface of a human. Each person has a different set of bacteria, so the pheromone smell is different. This smell is captured by a special organ located in the nose. It analyzes whether the pheromone “chemical code” is appropriate for the expected one, and if so, the release of hormones of affection - dopamine and nitric oxide is triggered. If the “code” does not suit one another, there will be no love.
So we can say that love is chemistry in combination with ethical principles. One must remember that it is impossible to make someone love as well as it is impossible to control the release of the hormones in the blood. Love depends on too many factors, and that is why it is useless to stimulate it artificially. If you are not sure that you ever felt love, just relax, wait and let it happen. Legit.ng wishes you only true love!
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