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Nigerian writer recounts how he annoyed his son by feeding him cold beverage

Nigerian writer recounts how he annoyed his son by feeding him cold beverage

A Nigerian father has taken to the social media platform to share a glimpse of his life in the young fatherhood phase and it is simply hilarious.

The feeling of fatherhood is one dominated by joy, pride and the need to provide and protect. While this may be a sweetest things, it is also not exactly the easiest thing to do.

A Nigerian father identified as Usman Shamaki has given us a rather hilariously detailed story of how he annoyed his toddle after he tried to feed him cold beverage. What seemed like a little incident turned out to be something bigger as the little boy wasted no time in showing his displeasure.

Usman, who is a writer, took to his Twitter account to share the funny story. He wrote: "Last night I got to find out what a really pissed off toddler looks like: Sadiq has been weaned off breast milk & is now fed Ovaltine in addition to cereal & solid food. At night, depending on who is awake when he cries, my wife or I wake up to fix him a warm bottle of Ovaltine."

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Last night, I was struck by the flu and it was the full option kind of flu; blocked nose, sore throat, heavy head, etc. He woke up earlier than usual around 11pm and his mum fixed him a warm bottle of Ovaltine. He drank about half of it and dropped the bottle. I put it on the nightstand. My flu got worse and I couldn't sleep.

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Around 1am he awoke again. Recall I said I had been struck with the flu & I was feeling crappy. Rather than fix him another warm bottle or warm up the one he had discarded earlier, the devil beckoned me to give him the cold one instead. Wise me told silly me, this was a bad idea but I had found that sweet comfortable spot in bed and didn't want to leave it plus the flu. All of wise me's pleadings fell on deaf ears as silly me took the decision to feed him cold Ovaltine.

As hard as wise me tried to convince silly me it was a bad idea, I was not to be deterred. In fact, wise me even enlisted the help of an older friend called Mr. Prospective Hindsight to plead with me but my mind was made up. I was giving Sadiq the cold Ovaltine.He took one sip, took the bottle out of his mouth and threw it straight at my face. I was stunned! I looked at him and he gave me a stern look as if to say "What manner of bad service is this?" For a few seconds we stared at each other in a Mexican stand-off-ish kind of way.

I must confess, my resolve to keep up the staring game failed as his beady eyes kept looking at me judgingly. Plus it seemed this kid was better at this staring game than I was. So I stood up slowly and walked out of the room to fix him a warm bottle of Ovaltine.While I was fixing him a bottle, I couldn't help but wonder if what had happened had actually happened or perhaps I was hallucinating due to the flu. So I decided to peek in to see if I had really been bested by a toddler.

Yup. He was still there, staring at me with those beady, judgmental eyes, making me feel like I had committed a war crime by feeding him cold Ovaltine. "Because of cold Ovaltine? Is that why you're looking at me like this?" I thought. "Your drink is on the way Sir."With the kind of respect usually reserved for elders & kings, I handed him the warm bottle of Ovaltine, thinking we had buried the hatchet. Nope! As he drank he kept looking at me with those beady eyes, probably thinking of what terrible nursing home to put me in when I grow old.

"Ha! Kilé léyî?" I thought, as I was flooded with a torrent of regret for not listening to wise me and Mr. Hindsight's counsel earlier. Na me be dis? See wetin I cause for myself. This boy will most likely submit my name as a nominee for bad Daddy of the year for this.He downed the whole bottle, burped & tossed it aside. I picked it up gently, respectfully & placed it on the nightstand. To add a truck load of insult to injury, a boy who usually cuddles up to his mother to sleep turned to my side & kept staring at me. Ha! Will this ever end?!?

Just as I was about to concede defeat (let's face it, he had already defeated me earlier) and wake his mother up to help me appease him, he turned, cuddled up to his mother and went back to sleep. Praise God! It is over! But it was too late. The boy had established his dominance & won. He had tested my resolve & I had broken down. Things would never be the same. I curled up and tried to console myself. First Aneesa with her questions, now him with his hard stares. Fatherhood will be interesting.

Morale of this story: Ovaltine is a meal best served warm. Failure to do so will leave you feeling cold."

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